Second Chances
by TeamSheikie
Summary: Paul screws up and Stephanie leaves him but one night in a hotel room all alone and plagued with thoughts of her something rather unexpected happens...


You've done it again. Given yourself a god damn migraine over her again. Your body is shaking; convulsing in the after math of what you've just done to yourself. You spent a good half hour in the shower doing to your body what you wish she could do, what she had once done. What no other woman can do.  
You reach into the cabinet and grab the bottle of Tylenol. It won't help but you can convince yourself it will, for now. You lean on the sink not knowing if you're going to throw up or pass out. You slow your breathing and close your eyes. It's a prison. Cause every time you close your eyes, there she is. You feel the water roll down your body into the towel around your waist and you try so hard to focus on that but you can't. Even if you were being sawed in half she would still be on your mind. You throw back the pills with a mouth full of water and your mind still turns its wheels.  
You don't know what's she's doing or who's she's with. Is she happy- sad? Fuck all that does she miss you? It's funny how you were that guy that couldn't understand why people didn't just move on in life, until you became that guy. No one ever effected you like her.  
You've laid in bed crying. Crying. You've never cried for anyone before. But she isn't just some girl, no she's your girl. You sit on the bed in the otherwise fairly vacant hotel room. You cover your face with your hands and stare at your cell phone which sits in the floor beneath you. And it kills you. No sweet texts. No middle of the night 'I just called to hear your voice' calls. Those calls were so annoying back then. You smirk as a tear slowly makes its way down your cheek.  
Your friends call you a pussy and your family urges you to move on. The thing about love is in essence it's simple, until you've had your heart truly broken by the one you know with all your heart is meant to be yours you've no idea of the pain that comes with losing it.  
It's almost impossible to put into thought never mind words. One day it's there the next gone. You can't even remember how many hotel room ceiling tiles you've stayed up all night counting. How many endless nights you've stared at the tops of buildings in the crowded lit up cities.  
You get up now crossing the room to the massive picture window looking out onto the Vegas strip. She comes to your mind again. She's everywhere. Her scent in the night air, her eyes in the stars her hair god you can feel it running through your fingers her gentle breaths in your ear her soft skin pressed against your body. So many nights she laid in your arms and it didn't matter. She was your wife she was meant to lay with you it was part of the arrangement in life. Until the day she left and you realized in that moment you'd lost so much.  
It hits you that she never had to be there she just always wanted to be. You clench your jaw because the pain in radiating through you. Her laugh her smile, god her smile. Your heart clenches and releases. Her tears her frown.  
All the times you ignored her phone calls, left her in hotel rooms. Blew her off for special days birthdays family events. Always an excuse. She worshiped you and quite honestly you tore her in half. That day. Her suitcase... Her ring.  
You press your forehead into the glass as you take a deep breath. The look on her face flashes through your mind. It had been just over 8 months and there wasn't a word from her. Except her once in a while random calls. It went the same way every time. She would call and just breathe. And you would press the phone so close to your ear you thought it would explode.  
There was just that one night. 3 months ago. It was your anniversary night and she showed up at your hotel room. She was soaking wet from head to toe but you could still see the tears running down her cheeks and damn she had never looked so beautiful to you. You pulled her into the room and not a word was said as you had spent the rest of the night making love to her. When you woke the next morning you thought it was a dream, until you fully got up and saw what she had done. She took your favorite sweatshirt and in turn it was her favorite too. You had smiled to yourself wondering what it all meant.  
To this day you still don't know. Did it mean she missed and loved you or she missed and loved your sweatshirt. Of course you know it wasn't that insignificant but the mind tends to wander to strange places when left to its own devices.  
You pull on some sweatpants and decide to just succumb to your usual routine of burning a hole through the ceiling.  
Suddenly there is a knock on the door. You're startled because you have few friends in the business lately and then you remember Randy had mentioned showing up. Fuck that's the last thing you want to deal with. You wipe at your eyes but you know they are red and swollen you'll lie and say you were sleeping. You take a deep breath pulling your hair back as you swing the door open.  
Holy. Shit.  
She's nervous. It's obvious in more ways than one but immediately you notice her chewing her lip and swallowing awkwardly. She's shaking and her eyes are wide like she just witnessed a murder. She's fully dressed which is odd considering its nearing one in the morning. You haven't been alone with her since that night. You wonder if that's what this is and if it is you know you'll do it even if it kills you tomorrow.  
Making love to someone who no longer belongs to you is almost desperate it's an attempt to hold onto them to get them so caught up in you they forget all the reasons they don't love you anymore or all the reasons they aren't with you and just lose themselves in you. Only in that one moment is everything perfect in the world but the moment never lasts.  
You tilt your head to the side as you reach your arm out lightly running the back of your hand over her cheek. She reaches up immediately holding onto your fingers as she leans her cheek against your palm closing her eyes. You know just how to calm her down, you always have. You gently step backwards guiding her into your room as the door shuts behind her. She closes her eyes as her breathing calms. She's had many panic attacks before mostly due to her father and you know just what to do. She slowly opens her eyes as you give her a gentle smile pulling her against your chest. She leans into you resting her head right under your chin and you run your arm down her back pulling her into a hug. Finally she releases you and pulls back. She takes your hand guiding you to the bed. You sit down and your heart races. You still have no words and honestly they wouldn't matter. She sits next to you and takes a deep breath. You turn your head and lock eyes with her finally. She goes to look away as you tuck your finger under her chin making her look at you. God she's beautiful even in this mixed up state.  
She licks her lips taking another breath. She squeezes her eyes shut and you know something is really plaguing her mind.  
"Steph, talk to me." You say softly as you entwine your fingers with hers. "What's going on?"  
She swallows hard and her hand is clammy. "Can we fix this?" She asks softly.  
The smile on your face almost hurts its so wide and you notice the tender smile she gives back to you.  
"We can do whatever you want. I'm so sorry Stephanie." You say almost in a panic and suddenly you want to tell her a million things at once. "We can move to Brazil, climb Mount Everest be vegetarians have a thousand babies-"  
She holds her fingers to your lips effectively silencing you for now and licks her lips nervously as she bites her bottom lip.  
"Paul that's why I'm here." She says and your mind is blank.  
"You wanna do all that? Okay." You say with a happy shrug.  
"No dummy!" She said as she turns more serious. "Paul I'm- I'm pregnant."  
"You're pre- how... Oh."  
She grips your hand and waits for you to look at her.  
"I don't expect us to get back together tonight Paul. I just want to know if there is a chance." She asks and she is gently running her thumb over yours and the butterflies in your stomach are going nuts.  
"Steph- I'm so sorry. I was such a jerk I don't deserve a second chance but if you'll give it to me-"  
She cuts you off when her lips crash against yours and its all back.  
Her scent.  
Her taste.  
Her voice.  
Her skin.  
Her tears.  
You begin to kiss her neck shoving her coat off at the same time.  
Her breath is in your ear.  
She moves to sit in your lap and you begin pushing her shirt over her head as it falls to the floor behind her and you smile as you stop, pressing the back of your hand against her bare stomach. She smiles widely wrapping one arm around your shoulder as she leans her forehead against yours placing her other hand against yours on her stomach.  
"I want you back." You whisper kissing her softly.  
"Here I am Paul, here's your chance."  
Later that night you hold her, like you are holding on for dear life because quite honestly you are. You run your finger tips over her bare stomach as she gently stirs in bed against you sighing softly as she grips your hand with hers. You smile as you thank God for this beautiful woman who's now given you everything. You thank God for second chances.


End file.
